Our stories
- Mark Discussion as New
- Mark Discussion as Read
- Float this Discussion for Current User
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Printer Friendly Page
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 06:41 AM
06-07-2020 06:41 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
I am sorry it's tough. Is it a particular something or an everything/nothing kind of thing?
Do you have your taps?
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 06:54 AM
06-07-2020 06:54 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
Timber, shed and people sound like a good break @CheerBear . Is your desk ready to be moved? Did you use fire?
Yes, I have new taps. 👍👍👍Such a difference now. Plumber arranged 8.30 start, but arrived 9.30, so I was doubting myself about what I had heard.
I have some big internal stuff happening. The big BAD in me came out in force, which causes withdrawal in case I infect everyone and everything. But it’s time to try and challenge some things. Why my inside twists at the mention of self care/soothing. I think I’ve face my past by, it happened to THEM, not me, but the realisation is shifting . Part of me knows I can do this, the other part is ready to run. I’ve found some useful, very useful info. I’ll leave a link if you’re interested. Talks of triggers, and manage stuff.
Work for you today. How is that feeling?
@Appleblossom 👋👋💞💞
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 07:09 AM
06-07-2020 07:09 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
I'm so glad you have new taps finally and that they make a difference. Part of the chicken build was to make it easier for well one who has hurting hands, like yours. Small things like easier latches and locks make a difference for her too.
😔 for the big internal stuff. I am curious whether the bad feels scary for you? Sometimes letting the bad inside me out can feel cathartic in a way, though I too worry about the impact on others. Was the mention of self care the trigger? I'm very interested in the link if you feel up for sharing. I am glad to hear you are challenging some things. It's tough going even trying to undo lots of years of conditioning. Big love Maggie.
I am a bit meh about work today. I have four kids here as one of my closest friends mum became very sick very quickly. We have had one of her crew members since Thursday. Middle's Best friend. Work from home with four is not going to be easy.
How's your day looking today?
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 07:13 AM
06-07-2020 07:13 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
Hugs
Hey @CheerBear @Sans911 @eth @outlander
I can relate to insides that turn against ideas of self care. Only a few years ago I would go into an inner tantrum about "pampering" and stuff. It has been a slow change and inner work to see how that hampered my mood and lowered my experience of life. Still not able to pamper, except in some food ways, and ambivalent and yoyoing about it. More accepting of the NEED and that I have the RIGHT to self care these days. ... and to stop self punishing.
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 07:35 AM
06-07-2020 07:35 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
I smiled visualising the chicken mansion @CheerBear. They are lucky girls. You are so caring doing things that make life easier for well person. Every little bit helps.
Sorry you can’t get the desk home, very annoying. When I was getting my bed moved, I checked gumtree, they have Ute movers. Pricy though.
I don’t get triggered by self care for others @CheerBear , just me. It’s been very upside down understanding, or trying to understand the concept, when previously, I’ve been taught the complete opposite. I think it’s the separation between me and others, outside of me, not my internals. One is ok, the other ( me) not ok. I’ve found some strategies, but changing my brain connections will take time. I’m operating from my trauma brain, threads from back then, they no longer apply, but my brain still reacts as if it was/is there. The link is www.PODS-online.org.uk.
Work with 4 kids will be challenging today @CheerBear . I hope you have milk and coffee. Sorry about your close friend mum. So good you can be there for her though.
I have some flat cleaning today, so not too bad.
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 07:43 AM
06-07-2020 07:43 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
@Appleblossom The self punishment is a big one for me. It been more normal I think. I’ve formed a mentally that I deserve it. I’ve become my own abuser. A difficult pill to swallow. But I will try some small steps, it’s the guilt and shame that come with trying, but I’ve moved past feeling guilty for breathing too much air, so anything is possible.
Its a slow journey, but bit by bit, who knows.
Big 💙💙💙💙. @Appleblossom
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 01:56 PM
06-07-2020 01:56 PM
Re: Taking the plunge
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
06-07-2020 02:48 PM
06-07-2020 02:48 PM
Re: Taking the plunge
@MaggieJust the simple phrase ... that you have gotten past breathing too much air ... says so much.
About the good and the bad:
If my devils are to leave me, I am afraid my angels will take flight as well.
Take Care ALL
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
07-07-2020 06:47 AM
07-07-2020 06:47 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
@CheerBear Heading for a second ☕️☕️.💚💚
How did yesterday go? Do you still have 4 kids plus work today?
@Appleblossom @eth @Sans911 @outlander @Gazza75 and anyone passing 👋👋
- Mark as New
- Favourite
- Subscribe
- Get link
- Flag for Moderator
07-07-2020 06:52 AM
07-07-2020 06:52 AM
Re: Taking the plunge
Yesterday was OK thanks Maggie. Work was good. I have some notes to finish this morning which is a bit annoying. Only three kids here today.
How is your day looking today?