Lived Experience Forum

[Maggie]

That’s good to hear @frog . The week off, and some breathing space might make a difference.

I’m stuck in a dark hole at the moment. It’s been a struggle for a while now. It’s hard knowing what to do to find a way back up. I’m heading out into the garden to do a bit of digging. It’s warm here, but no sun out. Good for digging.

Take care @frog 💚💚🐸🐸

[frog]

I'm sorry you're in a dark hole. I know what you mean. I hope it gets better soon.

Enjoy your digging

[Lostandalone]

Dear body and mind

is is really to much to ask that I be able to sleep when I should sleep... and be awake when I should be awake

everyday it is the same... I struggle to stay awake... but the second I climb into bed my mind goes into hyperdrive and I am more wide awake than I have been all day.... and as much as I love daylight savings.... it doesn't help

i am sure my mental health would be much better if I could regulate my wake/sleep patterns 

[Antelope]

Sitting here in the safe room for a while, trying to gain perspective and more understanding of this illness called Menat Health!

There are so mamny components to it and yet it is just one sometimes overwhelming feeling of darness.

I will snuggle up inthe blankets @frog dropped off and enjoy a cup of coffee with @Maggie .

After a while I will have to get back to the real world and try hard not to feel so overwhelmed, and like I just want to curl up in a ball and cry. Maybe it is okay to do that for a while, then I need to find a way to move on.

[Lostandalone]

[Maggie]

@Antelope  It is ok to sit and cry, to stop and try to get your head around all of this.

There is usually someone snuggled up in this safe space, so you are not alone.

I’m stopped for a coffee and some rest, I’m trying to outrun my racing mind. It never works, but I keep trying. I’ll leave one here for you. ☕️☕️☕️ and some 💜💜💜

@Lostandalone  Yes to the shoutout. 💙💙💙👍👍👍

[Antelope]

Hi @Maggie  and Everyone,

Hope something nice happens for you today!

I need to make my reality feel more safe and secure!

[Maggie]

@Antelope  Sending you some 💜💜💕💕

[Lostandalone]

Just checking in... hope everyone is doing ok 👍🏻 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

[Powderfinger]

I completely need to offload before I EXPLODE. Before I go on, if you are easily offended, do not read this, and sorry to the big polar folk who are not abusive and genuinely work on their own illness. 

Here I go. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have seen countless numbers of people, including myself, get into relationships with Bi Polar diagnosed folk. Whether 1 or 2 it doesn't matter. Each and every single time, the person eventually leaves. WHY??????? DOMESTIC VIOLENCE. I AM DAMN TIRED OF PEOPLE SAYING ITS PART OF THEIR ILLNESS. IT DAMN WELL ISNT. There is no fine line. Each and every single one of them commit acts of domestic violence and acts of various forms of abuse. I grew up with it in a household where abuse was rife. I should have been removed from child services. Too smart to cover their tracks and convince me it was love. 

Been with too many asshole bipolar people in relationships to know that they use their illness and pity party vicrimhoods to abuse, manipulate, tear you to absolute shreds AND THEY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING. 

THEY ARE COWARDS AND ABUSERS. They will rip you to shreds until they find their next victim. They will use their medication as a form of abuse against you. They will first make it seem so believable what they are saying until it keeps happening and they change the plot. When they see something isn't working anymore, they will not stop and they will work out a new plan with the same thing. 

They will convince you it us you who is going crazy, cause you to doubt your sanity, make excuses for their behaviour, will not take responsibility to fix it nor change it. They will feed you lines to tell you they are going to change, go to dv counselling and right at the last minute, they will deny it all and say there is no problem. They will behind your back tell other people you are the issue. You are the cause of their state of mind. They will always blame you, someone else or their bi polar. 

In saying all this I have met one person whom I respected, liked and looked up to. A person with Bi Polar. In a commited marriage, with children, running mental health groups in hospitals and the community, and managing her illness. The most sane and inspirational person I have ever met and will always hold in high regard. 

So, no the game is over. Time is up. Gloves are off. What us being taught is putting lives at risk and permanent damage is being executed to innocent people. I'm stepping up and saying it how it is. I have zero tolerance for these shmuck of society. I took my ex to court and won a restraining order. It wasn't her first time in court, will not be her last, but I hope that one day they lock her up and throw away the key before she kills somebody. 

Done and dusted.