Lacking direction, unsure of what I need to do and generally just fed up.......

[MDT]

Indeed @eth
One day at a time hey

[MDT]

@outlander @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Appleblossom @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Angels333 @Sophia1 @Faith-and-Hope
@Ant7 @Adge @Former-Member @utopia @Scarecrowe @Former-Member @Dani1981 @Jacques

Hey.

Today I was required for overtime. Finished at 5:50.
On way home now.

Today at work I had a bit of an epiphany.

It's an odd time for it given what's going on around the world with covid.

I realised today that I am handling life and work balance well. I am glad. I've adapted to 4 new workplaces in the space of 6 months. That's taken a lot out of me. New colleagues. New travel arrangements. New rapport. New workstyles. One thing I also noticed was that I make first name basis with coffee shops pretty quick. Probably Because I drink decent amount of the stuff.

I have also counted that I've net over 40 new people on that time frame. But each interaction builds I guess.

It's tested my patience and my resolve. I think I have a stronger spine now. Today I basically had to keep asking a colleague to help. I apologised about it but they understood. It was a silly situation to be in Beyond control.

The whole dating thing still plagues my mind. I am young so I don't believe j can help it. All I can do is work with it and see what happens. I am on the negative side of that though. I do think it'll just get harder as I get closer to 30. I have really started to ask myself what i want. A relationship or something less meaningful? I need find the real answer be for so worry about it more. Only by knowing that answer can the issue be dealt with on the best way.

It seems like as the world has gotten chaotic there is a sense of control or at least a sense of achievement that has come about.

While I May not be where I want to be atm (wherever that is) I know for sure that its better than where I was before... say 18 months ago.

I saw one of my oldest friends the other day who I see rarely. He now hooks up a lot and does hard drugs. He is a party boy basically. It's so interesting to me because we started in life with very similar scenarios. And yet how differently things turn out.

Idk forumites. I feel exhausted.

[Bunniekins]

@MDT  Hey Hams one thing I have found is that life tends to sort itself out (as long as you dont do anything too crazy lol). You are doing well my young friend wth all your achievements. Not only are you sensible and hard working but you are fun and nice to have around. Good to hear you being kind to yourself. peaxx

[Meowmy]

@MDT you have done great. Take it easy. Hope you get to relax over break.

[Jacques]

hi my friend @MDT that is great you are settling into your jobs so well and feel you are coping with it. 

i met my first girlfriend at the age of 35 we are happily together to this day, i never thought it would happen for me too. i think the more you force it the more unlikely you are of meeting someone who is worthy of your love and affection. 

you are an awesome person and i know in time you will meet someone, maybe on a train, online chat or games or whatever you like to do.

i know it is easier said than done but try to focus on having fun and meeting new people and you will find your right match mate.

im so glad you got out of the drug scene, it can really bring you down. im glad you are getting your life together and are finding direction. 

[MDT]

Yeah I only did weed once @Jacques

It's silly I think.

Thanks for your kind words.

And yours too super pea or PEAPEAPEAPEAPEA 😛
@Bunniekins and Meowmeow @Meowmy

[Sophia1]

all part of learning about life @MDT 

sitting back and looking at how much you have actually achieved whilst you were being so hard on yourself puts everything into perspective and sets aside at times what really matters..

the dating thing...take your foot off of the accelerator..

ease back for a while..

priorities..

I have a son who is the same as you and he keeps telling me how rude and arrogant many young females are..

no offence ladies on here...

it is true we are in a world where self photographs...self images...self importance...I want,, I need I must have it now has taken over...

be careful what you wish for is what I tell him..

let it happen naturally..

you might sit back at a time in the future and think why did I waste all of that time and emotional energy on looking when I have and am where I want to be..

best of luck as always

I love reading the turn arounds in your moods.

you are an interesting person...

it is okay

relax I am far too old married not interested..not flirting..

familiar with the topic with son.

😉

[Sophia1]

ps @MDT 

my son has many female friends now as a result of his search..

he is particular

perhaps too fixated on miss perfect who knows...

tis life

[eth]

Best wishes to you @MDT   I too am always impressed by the way you come out of down times and reflect so positively on where you have come from and where you are at now.   And I agree with others here who have said don't push yourself too hard to find a relationship immediately.  I've always found that I meet the better people when I'm not actively searching for them.  I firmly believe in 'the one' and that we can find that person at any age.  You have lots to focus on in the meanwhile.  I also believe that we need to love ourselves first because then we have the most to offer another.  Said she!!!  Haven't shared my life since 2009 and that didn't end well.  But I'm ok about being solitary for the time being.  So much personal growth to work on before I would let someone else all the way in to my heart.  And in these days I see it as a privelege to have the space in life to do that work.  That's just my humble opinion.  Take it or leave it!  Keep up the good work on yourself and the wonderful realisations my friend.

[MDT]

@Sophia1 @eth

Thank you both for your kind words. You are wise and have learned a lot. Sharing what works is always great I think 🙂