Our stories
Hi @Smc @greenpea @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Georgie_Girl + everyone
Yep... agree with everything SMC has said there. especially the 'it hurts' part .
I have often been accused as the source of Darlings problems (Even DV by one `helpful` ED staff member). Often in the medical field concern is confused with control.
Both Darling and I have been told by different mental health 'professionals' that we are the source of each others problems and should leave. The first clown I went to see even suggested he could no longer see me if I did not follow this advice, needless to say I never went back and didn't see anyone again until after a complete burnout.
Thankfully I have not had the in-law issues some of us here have spoken of. in fact I don't know how I could have survived without the support of darlings parents. Kind of why living under the same roof now works so well and the only reason I considered it.
Darling unfortunately has clashed with my family but that is more to do with managing unique personalities than family being negative towards her. My family all lover her dearly. Reading everyones experience here I am so thankful for the relationship I have with my inlaws and miss MIL so much 
I have for some time now had concerns around perceptions with our children (S2 in particular) given their environment and how unwell darling has been. Have been assured though by more than one councillor of my own and a councillor that S2 sees that they don't see it as an issue. not ideal environment but sufficient insight and support in place to alleviate such concerns.
@Smc that has always been me argument.
I agree as long as we are together I will always have anxiety and depression to some degree, but that is for me to manage, not blame darling and leave her to fend for herself. If I go where does that leave her and post children. what about them. For me a big part is that I made a commitment 'for better or worse' but even without that it is not in my personality to ditch someone in their time of need, that would create emotional issues all by itself (for me and my personality at least).
My main beef and most of us here can most likley relate to this, has always been I need support and direction, not someone to blame. support and direction needs to be ongoing not something that can be achieved in 6 visits. Sometimes that may be to simply download, other times that may be 'this is what you need to do', or confirm a plan or even be told, no maybe this may be better. This may not work for everyone and it may change for me some time in the future but it is what I need now but is so hard to achieve. And something that is hard wiht friends or family who are most often not equipped to deal with this.
This space (sane forums) has been invaluable but even here I don't like to over share on deeper issues as everyone has thier burdens. being able to acknowledge emotions though with people who understand is of great benefit. I have never had that before arriving here and appreciate all the friends I have made here very much.
