Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[SJT63]

@WinstonOBoogie I have missed you but now I know where you've been. Very sorry to hear how badly things are going despite the sacrifices we make.

Things here are pretty much the same except I don't talk about it any more because everyone, from these anonymous forums to my own psychologist have pretty much said if I'm not prepared to leave then suck it up and stop whining.

Not all days are bad of course, but the bad days are horrid. Still, I don't think I can justify reneging from the promises I've made to him and his parents until he actually hits me. I'm just trying to go numb inside so that he can't hurt me anymore and if I no longer feel pleasure either well, it's a small price to pay.

I hate it when they lock you out. I now keep spare clothes in my sewing room in case I'm locked out of the bedroom so that I can still go to work.

Yes, lost and alone. I wanted my psych to help to not take on board the hurtful things he says and does but even she thinks I should leave. I have a lot of trouble coming to terms with our society that now puts self at the centre of everything. I know he won't change, I don't expect him to change so why can't someone help me change myself to suit? Is that a big ask?

Sorry babe, you've caught me on a bad day. I'll write again soon when I'm not so cranky.